14 - Unlocking Your Dream Career With The 5 Love Languages

It brings me great joy and fulfilment to help and support others. When I have taken the time to reflect on this, I am reminded that I joined the British Army at 17 years old to serve my country, throughout my life I have given my time and expertise to charities I am passionate about, and love coaching and mentoring. 

It was only when learned about the ‘Five Love Languages’, developed by Dr. Gary Chapman that it actually clicked. My love language, or shall I say the way in which I most naturally give and receive love and affection is ‘Acts of Service’. 

A light bulb went off in my head! 

In my journey towards personal and professional fulfilment, understanding myself and those around me was a crucial step. Here are the 5 Love Languages:

You can take the free quiz HERE to find your own love language, and read on to see how you can use it to find a career that aligns to you.

Not only does it help you better understand yourself, but when you know someone else’s love language you can speak to them in their language too. Whilst I appreciate gifts (my lowest scoring), they actually make me feel very awkward! If you help me with a task, I absolutely know you care. And because Acts of Service is my love language, I will naturally tend to offer my service to you - your Love Language may be very different however, and therefore you may not receive it with the message or impact that was intended. 

Benefits of knowing your Love language:

• By identifying your primary love language, you can gain deeper insights into your emotional needs and preferences. 
• This self-awareness can extend into various areas of life, helping you understand your motivations, strengths, and stressors.
• Recognising the Love Language of those around you, whether colleagues, friends, or family, enhances your ability to communicate effectively and build stronger relationships. It promotes empathy and respect for different perspectives and needs.

Reflecting over the years it makes absolute sense - I would rather spend half a day to shift a pile of logs or mow your lawn than buy you something you probably don’t need for your birthday (sorry mum!).

It is almost a visceral thing, often not something that you can put your finger on and of course it doesn’t make you right or wrong just different. The more we know about ourselves and those around us, the better we can support ourselves and those around us. 

I challenge you to find out your love language and ask those around you too, or see if you can figure it out yourself. You may be suprsised and hopefully have an “aha!” moment the same way I did. 

While initially intended for romantic relationships, I have found these principles universally applicable, they can significantly enhance interactions in various aspects of your life, including your career. I have also heard them called languages of appreciation in the workplace but I will stick with the original Love Languages as it is what I most resonate with...

What Are the 5 Love Languages?

The 5 Love Languages are:

Words of Affirmation

• Verbal expressions of appreciation and support.
• Encouraging words that uplift and motivate.

Acts of Service

• Actions that go beyond words to show care and support.
• Doing something helpful or kind for someone.

Receiving Gifts

• Thoughtful gifts that show appreciation.
• Symbolic items that reflect gratitude and care.

Quality Time

• Spending undivided, meaningful time with someone.
• Engaging in activities together that foster connection.

Physical Touch

• Physical gestures of affection, such as hugs or pats on the back.
• Non-verbal ways of expressing warmth and comfort.

So how does this tie into my career? 

The principles of the 5 Love Languages can also shed light on your career aspirations and work environment preferences. For instance:

• If "Words of Affirmation" is your primary language, look for roles where feedback and recognition are emphasised.
• If you value "Quality Time," seek careers that allow for team collaboration and meaningful interactions.
• "Acts of Service" might guide you towards roles that involve helping and supporting others, such as in healthcare or social work.

Steps to take

1. Identify Your Love Language
2. Learn Others' Love Languages
3. Apply in Daily Interactions
4. Integrate into Your Career Path

I have created a free resource to help! Download your free PDF Guide with a list of careers that would align with your love language HERE! 

Reflect on how your love language aligns with your current career, are you aligned or is this the reason why you struggle to get out of bed every morning? Does your Love Language align with your future career goals and now you understand why? Or are you still none the wiser about what you want to do in life?

This is such a powerful tool, one of many that we can use to help us find our passion and build a life of fulfilment.

Let me know how you got on my sending me a message at [email protected]

Always with love, 

Elsa x

p.s. the image is of me serving my country, I was 21 years young!